Dear abundance seekers I take immense pride in welcoming you to week 22 and the first in the “Trust yourself” series. Now that you “Know yourself” and have worked on improvising your relationship with you are ready Trust yourself too.
Why is Trusting yourself so important?
When you can trust the bus/cab driver with your life why cant you trust yourself? your instincts ? your gut?
When I asked this question to a bunch of people they unanimously said that the fear of criticism and non acceptance was the main culprit. Hence here i am trying to break it down for you.
But what about criticism? Does this not hamper trust?
Its a choice that you make. Choose a good one. Criticism from others and self is the main reason why you and me find difficult to trust. Be your best friend and stop all criticism. And remember not all criticism is bad.
Lets break it down for you.
Step 1. Listen honestly; Until you listen with an open mindedness how will you process it. Understand its reason, nature and intent. This is not only help you take feedback but also give feedback. Notice how you reply to a post on social media, the quality of your words.
Step 2: Analyze whether it is constructive or not. Instead of rolling your eyes, look at it as an opportunity for improvement.
Step 3: If it is not constructive, avoid such conversations/ people in future and even if you happen to be in such a place , just smile and move on. Do not engage. But once you think its constructive, introspect and work on improving it.
Step 4: Learn the art of silencing the critic. Take mental notes and plan your action.
Another smart way is to be unpredictable and do what is not expected of you. Stay silent, smile, thank your critic, shake hands and move on. Another solution would be to do a cause – effect exercise. Try breaking down criticism , and go back to its roots.
example : you look awful in that dress!
- Is she jealous! no she can afford it too
- Is my body out of proportion, maybe I have been partying often.
- goal: cut down on calories
- set a reminder to workout
- thank her for her statement by saying: “I am so grateful to you, you just made me realise i have been missing my workout sessions”
- Loose weight and next time you wear that dress make it a proper fit
Building self trust is hard. Too often we stop believing because we can’t face rejection. But often failure is the necessary feedback to change course or to look at something with a fresh pair of eyes.
If you want to do anything though you have to believe that you are capable. Pushing yourself isn’t just the myth of the great, it means you are prepared to follow your gut instinct and do something because you know you have no choice. The more you can overcome the demons of change, the more likely it is you will slay the Resistance
Self-trust is not trusting yourself to know all the answers, nor is it believing that you will always do the right things. It’s having the conviction that you will be kind and respectful to yourself regardless of the outcome of your efforts.
Have a great week on building self trust and trust me it will be awesome.
happiness and sunshine