10 words to my son on his 11th birthday

You and I shared the same heart beat 11 years ago, and now every time I see you I can see my heart outside my body living life miraculously. I remember waking up in the night, feeling you move inside me. I would sit up at night,feeling you move, imagining what you might be like.And i know if i had written a letter to God with a list of what I want in my little boy, I can safely tell you,He decided to grant every ask, every prayer.

Now that you are not so little anymore and turning into a fine young man, I want to tell you these 10 things to mark your special day.

1) Take your time. I know you are growing up. I can hear it in the slight changing of your voice. I can see it as we measure you, buying new clothes and shoes. I recognize it in the way your questions about yourself, your friends and the world around you are maturing. But, Buddy… don’t be in a rush. There will be plenty of time for you to be ‘big’.

2) Forget fair – I admit it, you rarely say, ‘that’s not fair!’ – and I suppose that means I’m doing a portion of my job correctly. You see, life isn’t fair. You don’t always get what you want. Honestly, you don’t always get what you deserve. The good guys don’t always win. But that is OK – there are beautiful and important lessons in losing and in learning that ‘fair’ isn’t a way of life.

3) Get up when you fall – Of course I mean this both literally and figuratively. When you are on the tennis or the basketball court, I trust you to get up when you fall. But I also expect you to dust yourself off when you don’t get the ‘A’ you wanted or the part in the school play. I want you to take a deep breath and try again when your team loses or you don’t make the team you wanted. I want you to aim high – every time, but know that every failure offers a valuable lesson.

4) Trust your gut – there have been a few times this year that you have come to me about a ‘feeling in your belly’. I couldn’t be more proud that you recognize that feeling – that you are learning to understand your gut is a beautiful guide for what is right and wrong in the world. It will also guide YOU in making correct decisions. Ignore it? You’ll typically find a mistaken path. Embrace it – even when it is hard? You will rarely regret it.

5) Keep your curiosity – I know your dad and I tease you about asking so many questions, but the truth is – I LOVE that you want to know so much about EVERYTHING. I love that you don’t JUDGE – that you want to know more about other cultures, religions, people, world events. Keeping an open mind. Wanting to know more makes you a better human being. I am proud of you.

6) Choose your Role Models Wisely – It is hard. I have a suggestion: look around you to see the people who are making the life decisions you WANT to model. Start with your Grand Dad. Hard-working. Organised. Committed. Dedicated to everything he does .Wouldn’t it be amazing to be able to say you made the same kind of difference to yourself and others around you like him?

7) Love – It sounds simple, I know. But I want you to always love life, your family, and the people around you as you do now. Take a few moments to think about what ‘love’ means to you right now and try to bottle it. This is the kind love I want you to embrace and carry with you. Remember how much you are loved and try to share that with others.

8) Allow life to teach you – Imagine having a butterfly tattoo on your wrist? like a butterfly, You should always evolve– always growing and changing. You and your sister are two of the greatest teachers of my life. Continue to allow the people and circumstances around you to offer life lessons and opportunities to grow.

9) Treat women well – I hate to say it, but you are being raised in a world that offers far too many examples of ways NOT to treat women and girls. Good news: you are being raised by a strong woman, you have a strong sister you adore and two strong grandmothers. Also? You have always been one to treat others with respect. I demand (yes, demand) you continue that. I firmly believe you will be an amazing partner, boyfriend and husband one day. You notice the small things, worry about others and lead with compassion. Keep it up.

10) You won’t always need me – But I will always be here. I’d like to think I will always have a starring role in your world, but I know that isn’t the case. You are growing up in front of my eyes, developing your own amazing thoughts and opinions and I’m confident this is just your beautiful beginning. You will not always come to me for hugs and comfort as you do now, but I want you to know, my love and support for you is unconditional.

Sparsh – I wish you another year of boundless happiness, of success, of growing friendships and learning experiences. I want you to know you are loved, admired and cherished. You are a true treasure, my little-man.

And I’m beyond grateful you still hug me as you do and share your secrets with me.

Love, Mom

29 Comments Add yours

  1. Sheree says:

    That’s truly lovely – words of wisdom for your growing son.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, sorry for the delayed response.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. So sweet! Happy Birthday Sparsh! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you Krishnapriya , shall convey your wishes to him 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. What a lovely message to your son! Beautiful.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. What a powerful message – hope your son read it

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I intend to sit with him and make him read each letter again today, don’t want him to miss on any word.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Great. Let me know your expression

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I meant 👍sorry that was a typo in emoji

        Liked by 1 person

  5. arv! says:

    Happy B’day Sparsh! Teaching your son to respect women is a great thing, Nidhi. I wish people were sensible enough to do so, it will make this world a better place. Your son is lucky to have a mother like you. Not expecting fair treatment? It is a very practical lesson and will help him adapt faster.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. That’s the point I want to make Arv! As a mother I cannot avoid shit to happen in his life , only making him more adaptable

      Liked by 1 person

      1. arv! says:

        Great thought, Nidhi

        Liked by 1 person

  6. pvcann says:

    Wow, what a wonderful letter.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Krishna says:

    Happy birthday dear Sparsh 😊💐👼🌹 It’s lovely and very meaningful Nidhi 😊❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Krishna , shall convey your wishes to him 🙂

      Like

  8. soniadogra says:

    Great thoughts. Your piece of advice has several layers and is multidimensional. Enjoyed reading it!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. gsps❤ says:

    That’s a great post.💛😊

    Liked by 1 person

  10. zadi says:

    Wow, I started reading this and I said to myself “ you must not cry” and that was exactly what I did CRY, this is so empowering and beautiful, as a mother of 2 boys I know exactly what you mean and the beautiful things that we wish our boys will become one day, thanks
    I’ll try to read this to my boys if I can 😢

    Liked by 1 person

    1. This is the best I could hear today Zadi. You made my day 🙂 I did read this with my boy and saw his expression change with every word. Hope it stays with him forever.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. zadi says:

        Oh it will dear, I barely know but you seems to be an awesome mother, and I always say, you think kids don’t hear you but they do , you just have to be consistent

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Love your thoughts on consistency. Thanks a bunch 💐

        Liked by 1 person

  11. Manoj Mehra says:

    This is very touching.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your kind words

      Like

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